Update on my life
When I was on vacation in Alaska, I wrote a journal entry about how I really don't care if I were to go my whole life without having sex. This of course means for everyone who doesn't know, I am a virgin. I am very much ok with that. I have had chances to have sex, but actually chose to resist because I didn't feel right about it for one reason or another. I am not looking for sex in a relationship, not that I am opposed to it. I truly feel that a method along the lines of The 40 Year Old Virgin would in fact be a good thing to starting a relationship. For those who are not familiar with that movie, it involves on going on a lot of dates without engaging in sex, I believe the number was 20, but I could be wrong.
I think that sex can complicate feeling in a relationship and actually hide your true feelings, of course this is just my observation from other people not from my own experience. I already have trouble with my emotions and feelings without sex even being involved, so I can only imagine how horrible it would be with sex involved.
I have a friend who has a friend with benefits and was telling me how great it was, but I could just never do that. I wouldn't want to have sex with someone that I didn't like, and I also wouldn't be able to separate my feelings for someone that I did like just to have meaningless sex with them.
In the past I have talked about how I really wasn't going to look for someone, but my mind and I guess also heart just have to find someone to have a crush on. I don't know why I feel the need to always at least have a small crush on someone, but it really can get annoying when your mind just latches on to someone who is clearly not who you are looking for just so you have someone to think about. It is not like I develop real big crushes on the girls, but it is more of a placeholder crush until the next person comes along.
I definitely have a way of convincing myself that someone is a good fit for me even if I know they are not at all. I don't really know why I am so needy to have a crush on someone.
As it stands I do have a crush on someone, but it really has come about in a very weird way. It is someone that I started following(could twitter have come up with a creepier term?) on twitter a few weeks ago. I followed her after something she had written was retweeted by the Minnesota Twins Twitter page, just for fun. I have noticed that she is hilarious, as well as a huge Twins fan. A girl who can combine those two things actually exists? I was as mystified as you are. She also makes lots of hilarious references to tv and movies, something I also really enjoy. Now the question is, do I actually have a crush on her? I think I actually do. The more I have found out about her, the more I have liked. She also does not drink, which is rare to find in a 24 year old girl. She is also very cute, while not a priority, never hurts. I am sure that m min is assisting with the development of a crush on someone who hardly even knows that I exist. I have tweeted to her a bunch of times and sometimes she tweets back, but I am sure she gets a tons of tweets and does not have the time to respond to all of them.
My current goal is to find a way to get her to follow me, that will be step 1. Step two will then be to possible find a way to see if she would go out with me in some capacity. I realize that this is a hard goal, but also it is just weird for me to think about. I don't know exactly how I would go about doing this, or even exactly where in Minnesota she lives. I just really think that from what i know of her that we would honestly have a fun time discussing anything and everything, from the serious to the comedic. She also pays attention to the comedy world, which I have been getting more and more into, thanks to twitter and podcasts.
As always posts like this are usually to help me clear my head and kind of act as therapy for me. I would love to hear any advice that anyone has for me, or any amusing related stories that people might have about similar things.
Thanks for reading.
Peter
I think that sex can complicate feeling in a relationship and actually hide your true feelings, of course this is just my observation from other people not from my own experience. I already have trouble with my emotions and feelings without sex even being involved, so I can only imagine how horrible it would be with sex involved.
I have a friend who has a friend with benefits and was telling me how great it was, but I could just never do that. I wouldn't want to have sex with someone that I didn't like, and I also wouldn't be able to separate my feelings for someone that I did like just to have meaningless sex with them.
In the past I have talked about how I really wasn't going to look for someone, but my mind and I guess also heart just have to find someone to have a crush on. I don't know why I feel the need to always at least have a small crush on someone, but it really can get annoying when your mind just latches on to someone who is clearly not who you are looking for just so you have someone to think about. It is not like I develop real big crushes on the girls, but it is more of a placeholder crush until the next person comes along.
I definitely have a way of convincing myself that someone is a good fit for me even if I know they are not at all. I don't really know why I am so needy to have a crush on someone.
As it stands I do have a crush on someone, but it really has come about in a very weird way. It is someone that I started following(could twitter have come up with a creepier term?) on twitter a few weeks ago. I followed her after something she had written was retweeted by the Minnesota Twins Twitter page, just for fun. I have noticed that she is hilarious, as well as a huge Twins fan. A girl who can combine those two things actually exists? I was as mystified as you are. She also makes lots of hilarious references to tv and movies, something I also really enjoy. Now the question is, do I actually have a crush on her? I think I actually do. The more I have found out about her, the more I have liked. She also does not drink, which is rare to find in a 24 year old girl. She is also very cute, while not a priority, never hurts. I am sure that m min is assisting with the development of a crush on someone who hardly even knows that I exist. I have tweeted to her a bunch of times and sometimes she tweets back, but I am sure she gets a tons of tweets and does not have the time to respond to all of them.
My current goal is to find a way to get her to follow me, that will be step 1. Step two will then be to possible find a way to see if she would go out with me in some capacity. I realize that this is a hard goal, but also it is just weird for me to think about. I don't know exactly how I would go about doing this, or even exactly where in Minnesota she lives. I just really think that from what i know of her that we would honestly have a fun time discussing anything and everything, from the serious to the comedic. She also pays attention to the comedy world, which I have been getting more and more into, thanks to twitter and podcasts.
As always posts like this are usually to help me clear my head and kind of act as therapy for me. I would love to hear any advice that anyone has for me, or any amusing related stories that people might have about similar things.
Thanks for reading.
Peter
Labels: relationship, sex, therapy, twitter
posted by weckpd | 9:28 PM
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