A boring day

Well it was a very boring day that turned into a boring night. I had been hoping about hanging out with my female friend tonight, but I guess she had something else to do. Oh well. I have been thinking about her all day after last night. I just wish I could spend more time with her. I am such a whiner, although I guess it is my blog so I can say whatever I want. I guess it is just a doomed crush. I really wish i didn't have a crush on her so I would be able to be happy with any amount of time that she wants to spend with me. I guess I just want what i know that I cant have. I guess I just wish I could have some signal that was definitive in one way or another. I just want to be able to know if there is really a chance or not. If not I'm going to just take it easy and stop bugging her. I just enjoy being around her and I hope that she feels that same way as I do. I just want to be able to stop worrying about it so much and let it all happen. Not that I dont want to have input on it, I certainly want that, but I just want to be able to not worry about it. Each time I am around her it just gets worse and worse. I guess im just kind of pathetic. Oh well. I think that is about enough complaining on my part. I am just tired of being so lonely. And I guess that I wish that she would be the one that could end my loneliness, but who am I kidding? Who falls in love with their first boyfriend/girlfriend? Being around her just makes me happy. I just want to be around her all the time. Well I think I should wrap up the depressing blog. Today was just such a rainy and gloomy day that it really made me wish that I had someone to be with.
Song of the Day: Pinball Wizard----The Who, I love this song and it really goes along with what I have been doing a lot lately. I have been playing a lot of windows pinball to try to take my mind off of other things.
Movie of the day: High Fidelity, I love this movie and really enjoy John Cusack's work in it along with his supporting cast. It is a melodramatic comedy that really speaks to me. Worth seeing.
Thats all for now. I won't be posting again until sunday evening at the earliest.